I was thinking more about this after I wrote my post Friends in all the right places. Granted, I should be studying for finals (last ones of my undergrad career!), but there are always more interesting things to consider than one’s studies!
Alright, not to harp on this topic or create (yet another) soapbox for my opinions to stand loud/proud on, but I just think friendships are SO interesting.
Think of the relationships themselves. How you get to know someone better and create a friendship. How they change over time. The circumstances and subsequent slow decline of a friendship lost because of diverging interests, different life stages, or “he said/she said” events.
A good friend of mine once told me that God puts certain people in our lives when we need them (i.e., when you are experiencing a rough patch in life, or when you are in yoga class, just whenever). When you are (mostly) finished with that experience or rough patch in your life, the friendship may dissolve because you don’t need that person anymore. And that’s okay.
At first, I was really put off by that statement. I mean, why would God do that? Why should I put work into a friendship if it is going to go south in a few years? I used to be really intense with friendships. I would get really upset with friends who didn’t keep in touch over the months. I mean, couldn’t they make time to talk for a little or send a Facebook post or…something?
But my viewpoint didn’t make sense. Friends are meant to uplift you, create fellowship with you, and guide you through life. Well, doesn’t it make perfect sense that those relationships wax and wane, just like the trials in one’s life? Just because you are friends isn’t a reason enough to maintain a friendship. It’s a two-way street…you both have to want to remain friends. This concept gave me a whole new light in which to view these relationships.
Some friendships stand the test of time, others don’t. That’s the way life is, and I think it’s better that way.
Relationships fade, but that bond that you once had never does fade. You may forget exactly why you were friends with that person, but you won’t forget the good feelings you had when you were with them.
To all my friends, past, present, and future: you live in a part of my soul and influence me then, now, and in the future. I will love you always.
And now I am off to study!